I can't bake because I cannot, I will not, follow directions. I don't have the patience to be a lemming (just kidding), but part of me thinks that if someone else came up with this recipe, I can make it better. Unfortunately, this experimental attitude which makes cooking with me entertainment, makes baking with me a complete disaster.

Enter the in-laws' bread maker. I attempted French Bread first and I followed the instructions to a "T." I really, truly promise that I did. By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way came. Although the scent which permeated the house would have made someone with Celiac Disease drool, the brick that emerged was completely inedible.

I next tried this recipe for Poppy Seed Lemon Bread from Allrecipes (they have 5 to chose from). It looked simple enough, I love lemons, I love poppy seeds, I love bread. I followed the directions again (which was nothing much more than dumping everything into the bread maker and turning it on) and this time we were successful.

They suggest whipping up a little Nutmeg Butter to spread on top, which I have not tried yet but it sounds delicious. The recipe also called for some ground nutmeg in the dough which I forgot so I'm including it in the list but I makes great bread without it. The Poppy Seed Lemon Bread is great alone, toasted with some butter, with a cup of coffee or even a beer. Enjoy.

PS: If you don't have bread maker, too bad, I have no idea how to make bread.

Ingredients:

3/4 cup of warm water
1 egg
3 tablespoons of lemon juice
The zest of the lemon, done with a microplane or minced fine
3 tablespoons butter, softened
3 tablespoons of sugar
3/4 teaspoon of salt
3 cups bread flour
2 tablespoons poppy seeds
2 and 1/4 teaspoons of active dry yeast (one package)
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg, omitted

I proofed the yeast in the water for about 20 minutes while I threw everything else in the machine. Once the yeast started to bubble a little bit, I added them and turned the machine on. I used our basic bread setting with a medium crust.

Nutmeg Butter

1/2 cup of butter, softened
1/2 cup confectioners' sugar
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg